My life has been spent dancing at the edge of other people’s comfort zone, zigzagging in capricious moments of wild abandon. Or perhaps I have held a steady course, steering towards my soul’s craving, while the world has jumped and stuttered and faltered beneath me.
This wayward journey has found me sailing close to the wind as I embrace living on the loose, rewarded with moments of profound gratitude and wonder. The faces I pass look on, at times, with awe hidden behind judgment, or longing gazing out from the bars of a self-created prison. I have called to many, hoping to ignite a spark of authentic freedom within them. But most turn away, refusing the brilliant darkness of possibility, choosing the dingy half-light of boredom and desperate recapitulation.
It is not courage or wisdom that propels me forward. I am not heroic nor enlightened, greathearted nor bold. My resume does not impress me, my degrees are only markers along the path. What remains is the sense that this life is mine to live, this journey mine to embrace, and I dare not waste it.
2 thoughts on “Capricious Abandon”
Loved this post! They say a life not lived is a life wasted. However, the majority of us are pressed into servitude through our work and obligations. We let what makes us live, makes us unique, and inspires us die on the vine as we pass thought our best years and adult life. Truly blessed are those who can live the life given them.
Well written, and such a poignant reminder about life.